when i was little i wanted to be a ballet dancer, but i was too short. and i wanted to be like those skinny , tall girls in the fashion mags with the long , straight hair, and the intense russian wolfhound faces, but i had crazy, wild curly hair (which wasn't cool then) and i looked more like a friendly beagle puppy, and ..i was too short. and then i got accepted into art school and i wore long ,black eyelashes and a big black beret, and carried a black portfolio and the business men reading their newspapers on the way to work on the train, tried desperately not to look at me..cause my maxi coat was so long and i was so short.
as i write this, i'm sitting in my studio ,and thinking about how lucky i've been to make my living as an artist. it's never been much of a living, but i've always worked in my field and i know that's a priviledge. i've had some strange jobs, and some great ones, but every time i pick up a pencil, i have a rush of joy! to "see" something in my head, in its finished form and chase it from my brain to my hand, thrills me beyond words..and when that design is captured just the way i want it on the page, it amazes me ..always. today, someone bought one of my prints and it was the most extraordinary feeling..the idea that something i created moved them to a point of wanting it to be a part of their life blows my mind..it makes me feel like i'm real..because as each of you that create understand..no matter how good it is, no matter how much we love that finished piece, we never believe that it's good enough, or that the next sale is coming..so tonite i will allow myself to feel like a professional and tell myself that i am good at what i do, and i will believe in my creativity..until the next time that i feel short.
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I know what you mean but as someone who loves to buy your creations and cannot wait for the next one. You ARE very good at what you do and every single piece is just wonderful, perfect, unique and special.
ReplyDeleteI am sure that everyone who sees one of your pieces wants one. This is the first time that I have written or said anything like that so it must be true :-)
Or as my daughter would sing (from Sesame Street):
Believe In Yourself
Oh you can be what you want to be,
See what you want to see,
Believe in yourself,
Believe in yourself.
Go where you want to go,
Do what you want to do
Believe in yourself,
Believe in yourself.
Some folks try to tell you there are things you shouldn't do
You're not strong enough or smart enough at all,
But what seems right to them quite often
might be wrong for you,
So be sure you try to climb
Before you get too scared to fall.
Oh, you can be what you want to be,
Learn what you want to learn,
Believe in yourself,
Believe in yourself.
Try what you need to try,
No one should question why,
Believe in yourself,
Believe in yourself.
Folks may say you're different,
That you've gone lost your senses,
But the world is yours to walk in,
Go ahead and leap the fences.
And you"ll see,
Believe in yourself
And the world belongs to you and me.
Leslie, I hope you can now see that I believe in you as I had to type the whole thing as your blog wouldn't let my copy the lyrics.
Ana
Leslie- from the moment we first "hugged", I was moved by your spirit. You are a remarkably talented artisan with a true gift for living life...in all of its happy moments, uncertain moments, dark sides and uplifting shifts. Congratulations on the sale, but more importantly, congratulations on being able to appreciate and understand the complexity of the journey.
ReplyDeletethanx ana and jennie,,you are each special and unique women that i am privledged to know ♥
ReplyDeleteWow! My sister is a pencil sketch artist, and I just helped her open her own Etsy shop. (Lindasgift) And I think you two could totally relate to one another. I've heard your words come from her also. You both have an awesome talent. I really admire you both :)
ReplyDelete